the new friend asked about hospital risk management (what i do for money, currently in a new position in a new place), possible medicaid restrictions on payment for readmissions (recidivism), foot injuries, age and relationship status, and a few other subjects and for whatever it might mean or be worth to you, here is the latest writing that says this is me, hello, hope you are a friend (or something like that :)
i must be a magician and easily as i disappear (clever opening lines sometimes skip past the awkwardness of long pauses between communications... but of course this sort of bare-assed analysis exposing the practical potential of cleverness can totally undermine any cleverness there might have been... unless, of course, you enjoy over-analysis and completely open honesty and the self-mockery of pulling back the curtain from the usual human pretenses like i do... so if you are laughing with me as you scratch your head wondering if you should be laughing, then yay and happy to be back in touch :)
busy times, working times, fun times... definitely away from facebook and email times... texting was the only communication going on the past few weeks... that's the facts, no offense intended, just in case the clever magician line is lame ya know? :)
hospital risk management can be stressful, heavy-weight legal decisions and very delicate negotiations sometimes, but hey, there are people trying to resolve the differences between religious fanatics in this world so compared to that task, i've got it pretty easy :)
the feds are always trying to save money at the expense of medical care and the ridiculous divide between free enterprise and compassionate health care for all is just another sign of the suicidal tendencies and selfish greed so dominant in the collective human psyche... the best we can do is try not to get too sucked into that rate race and insensitive way of seeing and thinking... tracking recidivism has been a hot button in this country in recent years and it should be, but there are many reasons people return to hospitals and the hospital itself is just one part of a mental health care system failure when a patient relapses... usually the real failure is the outpatient and community and family support systems that the hospital has no control over, but it's easier to blame the hospital for not permanently "curing" mental illness... government money-lenders are generally very shallow and quite ignorant of what they are actually spending their money on... enough soapbox :)
YAY! for three weeks plus off crutches (hoping you didn't rush it and relapse yourself :)
limping lasted for months after the boot went away for me... i still have limping days, most especially when first standing and walking... after a few dozen steps the muscles loosen up and the limping goes away, but expect months of stiffness with the first few dozen steps and the weather might effect the feeling too...
for me it was My Left Foot was The Color Purple lol :)
I am old... I am single... the latter is my choice lol... I came into this world with rock and roll, 1956, and i am still rocking and rolling... age is not just a number, but it is not an excuse to grow old either, so when i say I am old I am laughing cuz physically I run circles around people half my age and mentally i am still a carefree four year old most of the time (much to the chagrin of some of the grown ups who play with me :)
my roommate, best friend, adopted family, and jackson in my blogs is 35 she could be 75 or 15 physically cuz she is a little kid inside like me... my best friends in this life have been special ed teachers and therapists, lucky for me lol lam :)
traumatic events, well, i've had my share... getting literally shown to the door completely out of the blue for no specific reason while on crutches after 11 years of putting in 60-70 hours a week, at least, to keep a dysfunctional organization looking great to the government and the world was the worst event of this year... to broken ankle was not as much of a betrayal and emotional back-stabbing...
relationships have not gone well for me in this life and i've subconsciously avoided getting into one for the past 15 years cuz the last one left me actually homeless and bled dry... if it helps to share, feel comfortable doing a mind-dump or self-analysis or venting with me - i will respect and be as sensitive and responsive as i am able... i am pretty good at the humility thing as laughing at myself is my primary survival skill :)
sometimes i wish the bed was in the fridge when it's 90 degrees with 95% humidity and i really want fresh air... i love the tropical heat, but there are times i want to just 'chill' :)
so if i tell myself to check in here more often i might, but if i ask you to text me at 407-325-1482 and nudge me back here when you write words to me and you give me that gift of a nudge, then i will definitely not let weeks pass away from communicating... hopefully you will get to know me well enough to know that i do not need that nudge to care, i need it to remind me there is a world beyond my head and immediate daily life... i live in the moment most of the time (makes it easy to stay single, ahem, nudging myself there, see?) and stay busy sharing in the immediate physical environment...
but i do love to write in case you haven't noticed lol lam lam is laughing at myself, by the way, and i am laughing at myself for my not-so-subtle throwing this link in here :)
that link is to the daily blog, the more than 3,000 entries that have chronicled daily life moments for the past 4 years, sometimes one entry a day, sometimes ten or more - when i am completely reclusive and i have had those phases now and then in this life, the writing and babbling continues so i am not completely unreachable... just relatively lost in obscurity sometimes lam (and yes, there were daily blogs before this one, going back to the ninties online and 60's before the internet was invented by whomever might have invented it (i don't really think Al Gore did :)
so what's new?... i am jog-walking more easily (now if i only was actually doing it more often - he says as he looks at his budding Buddha belly - i hereby copyright that for an album or book title someday... maybe a diet book? lol :)
i am loving the new workplace and job... it's far from perfect, but the people i work with are much healthier and understand how much better teamwork is than divisive jealousy or paranoid defensiveness can be... the old place lacked trust and respect most of all... this place has both... and they seem to like what i can do too :)
home gets a bit lonely at times with E working way too much and enjoying a new relationship and church activities and spending a weekend a month or so in jacksonville with family and me trying to save money and not go out as much... but i love alone time almost as much as i love sharing (sometimes more) so all is very well and i have friends to have fun with anytime i want to... it's just more economical to be a homebody :)
focusing on getting back into a early wake-up work schedule has occupied the past few weeks... so getting sleep (something i am not good at - making time for it, that is... i sleep great when i give myself the time) has been a weekday focus... playing softball (two games friday nights, a practice on saturday, and at least two games, sometimes three or four, on sundays) and hanging with the teams for lunches or dinners keep the weekends busy... went to see ani difranco last friday after softball... almost went to see ingrid michaelson early last week, but it was a monday night and we decided not to... we have a 5k scheduled soon, so i am apparently a lot busier than i think i am lol lam... just miss the intimacy sometimes, sigh and all that emo stuff :)
did i catch up yet? :)
hope life is smiling for you and if not, hope you are good at standing on your head (it turns a frown into a smile for a little kid, ya know... just do it in front of a mirror :)
we shall stay in touch, even better if you do the nudge thing :)
and i appreciate your sharing and your patience and understanding as time goes by :)
and you too out there reading this blog, i appreciate you too, whomever you are :)
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